Are You Tired Of Being Told It’s Your Fault When It Comes To Your Love Life?
Let’s face it, the messages out there seems to blame women when it comes to their love life. For example, have you ever seen the cover of Cosmopolitan?
5 Massive Mistakes Women Make When Dating
7 Things Women Do Wrong When Approaching Men
9 Ways You’re Turning Him Off
And even my free report:
3 Heartbreaking Mistakes Women Make in Relationships
Yes, my own marketing is geared on the pain. In fact, advertising often focuses on the pain. Do you want to know why?
Because it sells!
Look at Madison Avenue in New York City, the advertising capital of the world. Their ad department spend hours focusing on what you’re doing wrong. The more you’re in pain, the more you buy. Well let me tell you, that’s bunk!
Let me say that one more time, that’s bunk.
So let’s get off the “what am I doing wrong” bandwagon and let’s talk about what you want. Let’s talk about what you’re doing right.
You’re kind and loving. You’re sweet and generous. You’re caring and considerate. And yet if you’re on my site somethings not quite right.
So today, I want to hear from you. What do you really want when it comes to your love life? What do you really want when it comes to men? This is your time to tell me your burning question(s).
That’s right, I’m taking a survey.
Do you want to learn how to talk to men?
Do you want to learn how to date online?
Do you want to learn why men disappear?
Do you want to learn how to avoid players?
Do you want to learn how to turn your relationship around?
Submit your answer below, what’s your burning question(s)?
Jonathon, yes, very tired of it. What is the most important for me to know?
I have a few.
How do I tell early on that he is afraid of intimacy or how to avoid “him” altogether?
And yes, why do they disappear when things are happy and connecting?
But I think what bothers me the most and is a big part of why I am hesitating putting myself out there again is, what is up with “The Chase”?
I’m not clingy or suffocating. I do not chase or stalk. Why do I have to pretend I do not feel something or feign indifference, to keep him from feeling trapped or being labeled as “something” . Yet I hear women, including friends of mine,talk about how they do this all the time.
What is that? Being pursued is one thing, but I have never liked being chased. It makes ME feel trapped and suffocated. What am I missing in regards to this?
Thanks Jonathon!
Kim
Those would be my questions at this time.
Jonathon,
I always seem to attract relationship-ready, marriage-oriented men, so
that’s not an issue. And I like good guys, not the bad boys, so that’s
not the issue. I keep my boundaries and standards, and good men seem to
respect that.
But I have seen a recurring tendency in my relationships that I have a
hard time shifting from the alpha female career woman to the girlfriend
who can sit back more and let the man make lots of decisions (even if I
may not agree), so they can be a hero. At least with all the years of
classes, workshops, books on relationships I’ve studied, I understand
more about allowing men to be heroes. But when I started my career,
there were few women in management, few female achievers or role
models, we had to compete with men and be “one of the guys” to succeed.
So it’s pretty ingrained in me.
Boyfriends and friend always comment that I am sweet so it’s not like
I’m in alpha, bulldozer mode all the time! But I would appreciate more
insight into making the shift from alpha career/independent,
self-sufficient mode into more of the girlfriend mode without giving up
the good and authentic parts of my personality.
Thanks Jonathon!
Jill
Yes – I DO need to learn to TALK to men about me, myself, my feelings, my wants, my day, my passions, my interests, etc. I have discovered a defensive, self-protective pattern of asking new men a lot of questions to learn about them to make sure they are “safe” and finally a few of them have told me that it drives them nuts. My last SIGO told me I need to learn to tell more about myself and that he also got nervous that I would use the information I learned about him against him someday! I have learned to be a good “listener” when they answer my questions, but then I’m frustrated that men haven’t asked anything about me, when in fact I need to be a grown-up and just tell/talk about me. But this is such a deeply ingrained, long standing pattern, and a carry over from my shy days that I honestly don’t know what a man would like a woman to volunteer about herself in those early meetings.
Why must women make all the adjustments in relationships. Shouldn”t he be concerned about whether he is making massive mistakes. Why must you say massive anyway. Why must we always blame the women? Why are women still told to change herself for a man when you men are always telling us to not try to change them. We are so unfair in distribution of blame to women.
Dear Friends, Thank you so much for your comments and sharing your frustration about the dating process. Your questions are being complied for a FREE call to be announced shortly via email… please be on the look out. During this call I will do my best to answer all your questions and share the male perspective when it comes to dating, mating & relating.