Men Aren’t Hard to Understand… Here are Tips 4–6 to Prove It

Men Aren’t Hard to Understand… Here are Tips 4–6 to Prove It

In the last blog, we talked about keeping things simple, not trying to change men, and taking his word for it when he says he’s fine. I hope you enjoy the following three tips and use them with your man. You won’t believe how quickly your relationship will improve.

Best Understand Men Tip #4

A man wants to make his woman happy.

If he can’t please you, he feels frustrated and unsuccessful in the relationship. That makes him feel like a failure and unhappy. Tell him what makes you happy and let him know when he’s done something to make you feel good; it will make HIM happy to hear it!

** Just remember, make it simple, or short n’ sweet… **

How you can make this tip work for you and your man:

Appreciate, appreciate, and appreciate.

All he wants to do is make you happy, and so many women focus only on the bad in the relationship. From today forward, say thank you at least twice a day and “I love you” at least twice. Kiss him when you separate in the morning, when you meet at night, and when you go to bed.

The quickest way to turn off a man’s love is to be unhappy. If you are truly not happy in the relationship, talk to him about it. If it’s something that can be fixed, do it. If not, then consider parting ways. But if you stay, be happy with yourself and with him.

This is not to say conflicts will never arise; they will. But if you’re both happy with each other and the relationship, you’ll turn them into small bumps in the road instead of letting them become gigantic craters.

Best Understand Men Tip #5

The male brain takes time to process things.

Just because he isn’t responding to something you said right away doesn’t mean he’s not thinking about it or doesn’t care about what you’re saying. It may take him an hour, a day, or sometimes even a week to respond to something you communicated to him, or to answer an important question.

How you can make this tip work for you and your man:

Just knowing this will help your understanding of men and your communication.

Make sure he did hear you, as sometimes we tune you out without meaning to. One thing we guys won’t admit: we can truly focus on only one thing at a time. If we’re working from home, for example, and you want to talk, we need to leave the computer alone while we’re talking. You can focus on our conversation and other tasks at the same time, but we can’t (not very well, anyway).

Once you know we’ve heard you, please give us time to process. We’re problem solvers by nature, so we need to think about the situation from various angles before moving forward. We’re not ignoring you; we’re being guys and taking our time to come up with an intelligent, thoughtful response.

Best Understand Men Tip #6

Do you find yourself feeling dissatisfied that you constantly have to NAG him about things?

Nagging is a sign of unhappiness and frustration. Spend time examining the source of this frustration. Is it something about him or is it about something you may be projecting about yourself onto him?

For example, if you think he’s taking you for granted lately, stop and ask yourself if YOU are the one taking him for granted, too. What is at the core of your unhappiness?

Constant frustration and nagging could also be a sign that he’s just not the right man for you. That’s okay, too, but admit that to yourself before you drive yourself nuts nagging him to change.

How you can make this tip work for you and your man:

If nagging isn’t the worst thing you can do to your relationship, it’s in the top three. It’s not always about what he’s doing or not doing, but he’s the nearest and dearest person around so he gets the brunt.

Here’s an example: Let’s say you’re looking for a new job because your current one has cut your hours. You feel let down and disappointed, so you’re upset. Your man decides to go to his buddy’s poker night, which he normally does once a month. Because you’re feeling bad about yourself, you get mad about poker night and take it out on him as he’s getting ready to go.

He didn’t do anything wrong or out of the ordinary. You’re just having a rough time, so you become upset and nag him about the oil change your car needs and he hasn’t done yet. You think he should stay home and work on your car instead of going out and having fun for one night. So you nag and nag. When you do that, you drive him out the door.

He comes home late (who wants to come home to nagging?) and you start in on him when he gets in. You’re driving a wedge into your relationship over nothing. You just realized your car was due for an oil change two days ago, so it’s not as if he had been neglecting it for weeks.

See how the way you feel about your job (or family, friends, or a dozen other things) can affect your relationship? Don’t allow outside issues to become a problem with your man.

When you nag, you slice his heart a little each time. The tone of voice, the cutting words, the implication that he’s not doing or being enough… all of these can, over time, kill his love for you.

Don’t do it.

Stay tuned for our next blog, where we’ll talk about making him feel needed, letting him fix things, why you want to compliment him, and how the fun stuff you do with your friends can help your relationship thrive. And don’t forget to sign up for more tips in the signup box on the right side of this page.