What’s the Best Way to Cancel A Date?

Text, email or phone…how do you prefer to be let down?

Let’s say you connected with a guy via an online dating site. You’ve emailed a few times. You’ve texted a few times. You’ve talked on the phone and planned a meeting. It seems like you have a lot in common and you’re excited to finally be meeting him.

But then he suddenly changed his mind after your last conversation. You have no idea what happened. Unfortunately this happens frequently and what most guys will do is just bail, which we all know isn’t cool.

I asked my readers how they would like to be told if a man is going to cancel. While some women don’t mind a text or an email, others feel that’s the easy way out..especially if they’ve already had a few conversations and set the date by phone. However, they also felt if the contact has been only digital, then it would make sense to cancel a date the same way.

It should be remembered that while technology has opened up avenues of communication and dating that didn’t exist a few years back, it isn’t perfect. Emails and texts can be lost or sent to the wrong person and can be viewed as impersonal.

My personal thoughts are that if the date is happening within 24 hours, then it’s best to make sure the cancellation is received as soon as possible. If you choose to call, share your truth and move on. If there’s no answer, then leaving a message with a follow up text would be your best option. However, if you’ve changed your mind about the person, there’s no need to do that over the phone (especially if the date is a few days out) because after you’ve said that you’ve changed your mind, there’s that awkward silence.

It’s best not to make someone feel bad in real time. A kindly worded email/text allows the person to process this on their own time vs. the immediate reaction over the phone. The reality here my friends, this is just dating (actually, more like meeting) and there’s no right or wrong with how one chooses to communicate because these days we have three options: text, email or phone.

The most important thing is that the guy mans up and communicates his intentions one way or another instead of just going no contact with no reason and making sure that the message is received.

Do you find yourself in a pattern of attracting emotionally unavailable men? Is there any way to break out of this heartbreaking cycle? In Is He Emotionally Distant? I’ll show you how to find a guy that’s worth keeping in five easy steps.