Why Men Lose Interest In Being Your Hero
A man wants to feel like a hero in his woman’s life. And for the most part, they will go to great lengths to keep their women happy. However, it can be really detrimental to the relationship if he continually takes the initiative to do thoughtful things for her benefit in the hopes that it will make her happy but the effort is only met with criticism or contempt.
Let’s say that he chooses a restaurant that she doesn’t like. Or he surprises her with a gift that she doesn’t really like. Even if she’s not upset with him about it, he feels discouraged. This is because her unhappiness is directly tied to his performance.
If this continues to happen, he feels he will never win with her and he loses the enthusiasm to keep trying.
How can you help him sustain interest in being a hero
First of all, lose any starry-eyed fantasy you may still be holding on to about finding a knight in shining armor. The perfect guy isn’t going to come along in a perfect package of great looks, financial success and the ability to read your mind.
For one thing, he may be a diamond in the rough. Maybe he isn’t a smooth communicator and has made some mistakes in the past. Look for his good qualities and show your appreciation for them..
You must understand your own role in developing the relationship. You have to make a conscious decision to either build him up or tear him down. A man needs compliments, enthusiasm and appreciation in order for him to keep coming back to give to you. if an effort he makes misses the mark, a soft and gentle reminder of what you do like goes a long way to keep him wanting to continue to try to make you happy.
Think about how you can best meet his needs. Strive to complement him, not to control him. Don’t get into a power struggle over leadership, but rather empower him to continue in his personal growth.
Affirm and encourage him
Most men fear failure in work, life and love. The more you affirm and encourage him, the more he’ll be inspired to be that leader and hero who truly cherishes you. But the more you nag and criticize, the more likely he’ll be to withdraw and possibly just give up. Be a supportive partner and continue to demonstrate it.
It’s a learning process that will take time, but will bear the fruit of a satisfying long term relationship.
He’s so into you..until he’s not. Why did he just pull away and disappear? If you’ve found yourself in this situation a few times, you’ll love my audio program Why Men Pull Away. You’ll learn how to know a flight risk when you meet him and the secrets to getting him to want to stay close.
We’d love to see you at our Facebook community for ongoing support and conversation!
This is brilliant. It’s too late to save my marriage, but had I had the balls to bring this up and she had the perspective to do it, it may have made a difference.